The Pathetic Race Episode #7 - On The Road Again

[phrasemuffin]

Episode 7

"On The Road Again"



Starring:

• GooBer


• hydeist_


• d_vinci

Special Guests:

• The Sabre


• AshtrayAssassin


• Insomi Seuno

hydeist_ and d_vinci had been sitting down at the Pathetic Triangle - the idea being taken from an old English tale (from the planet earth), the Round Table - when d_vinci was suddenly enraged by the seeming simplicity of the situation.
"ok, so now we know that Cloe and Jimmy are in The Yellow , why don't we just go there and get them?"

"You really have no idea what The Yellow is, do you?" GooBer asked, shocked that his friend hadn't learnt anything about The Yellow while under his wings. "We can't just go there – it is a state of mind not an actual place. And anyway, there are many levels to The Yellow that we could get lost in and get tangled in and get lost in and ... wait, I said that already... Let me just check the script ... ok. We could get tangled and lost in, or worse, trapped by. If we don't make the trip as short as possible, we might never get out."

"So what do we do?" hydeist_ asked as plainly as he could.

"To start off with, we have to get into Fallopia HQ, and then find where they are keeping the physical bodies of Cloe and Jimmy while their minds are in The Yellow , whih make it much easier to find their mental state. After we have them, we can reunite their minds with their bodies and bring them home safely ... assuming we have a way to get out of Fallopia HQ ... but that is beside the point."

“Yeah, why bother with an escape plan when you can just save your loved ones to die as one big happy family instead?” d_vinci retorted.

...

Clearing the Triangle of the lamington bits and flasks of ice tea, GooBer stood up and waved his hand over the table.

“Ok, here is the plan”

At that, the Triangle began to glow faintly, and thin lines could be seen stretching out from the centre and each apex. These lines grew darker and slightly thicker, becoming more visible as they transcended from the originally spidery scrawling to the current, and far more clear, etchings of what seemed to be an ancient building’s architecture. In short, the Triangle was showing the group the layout of what they could only assume was the Fallopic complex, Fallopia HQ.

“This is Fallopia HQ. It is located on an asteroid that will pass close to the second moon of this planet, as I have been told by one of my contacts.

Pointing to a slightly shimmering and circular object on the map, GooBer explained
“This is our entrance. We go in through this backdoor – it is disguised as a cellar door. The thing is, it is actually a grate in a wall fifty feet high. Go figure how they pulled that one out of their arsenal of disguise kits…

“Anyway, once we are in, we must navigate our way past the Ovis’ Basement Arsenal. This is where the most feared creatures that Ovis controls are put into storage for later use. Some of them we have faced, such as the Minor Battle Grax and the Forlong Beast. Others… others are even worse than those foul creatures we have tried to avoid this past year until the company had grown to full strength, what with our headquarters being the first of only three so far, and the only one with a full compliment of employees.”

“How the hell do you suppose we get past these monstrous beasts, then?” Tok’kir interrupted, stepping in from the other room, removing the bandaging from his side where GooBer had healed him.

“The same way we always do – quietly,” d_vinci answered “and with this, of course.” And he produced from his pocket a small piece of paper.

“This is the name of a contact of mine on Earth, that little planet a few star-systems over where they serve the best Italian food you’ve ever tasted. It is also the planet that is home to most of the Cheesemakers in this sector…” d_vinci hoped that Tok’kir would cotton on, but it was obvious that he had no idea what the tall and very green man was on about.
*Sigh*
“The word ‘Cheesemaker’ is an Underground code word for Weaponry and Arms Manufacturer. Most Cheesemakers in the universe live on Earth (a pokey little planet as yet untouched by Ovis' minions, which is why most Cheesemakers have hideouts there). This is, therefore, also the main corner of the Black Market Against Ovis, dealing in specialised weaponry and defenses for use against Ovis, as well as information recovered from the few remaining spies within Fallopia HQ. This particular Cheesemaker’s name is Insomi Seuno, and is not only on the Council of Traders that governs the Underground Black Market Against Ovis, but is also their most gifted designer and builder of weapons and shielding. Also, he shares my fondness for Human cuisine. He is on his way as we speak.”

“So there will be the four of us, plus one Cheesmaker?” hydeist_’s face white with shock. “And that’s supposed to be enough to take down Fallopia HQ?”

“The plan isn’t to take down Fallopia HQ,” GooBer explained, “it is to save Cloe and Jimmy… though, if in the process the Fallopic complex does fall, I can’t say it would be a bad thing.”

“Nor would I.” said a female voice at the door.

Everyone turned around to see from whom the last words had been uttered, and saw a figure not at all hard on the eyes. The black leather clad lass stepped into the main room, the metallic sheen of her sabre and her gun, Mach, glistening in the soft glow the Triangle.

She made soft squeaking noises as the leather rubbed against her legs, but none of the men heard that. All they noticed was her sleek black hair falling down her back, shining and swaying as she moved, her dark blue eyes, and her pale greyish skin.

“Sorry boys – didn’t mean to spoil the party.”

“Ashtray Assassin! What are you doing here?” GooBer rushed to her excitedly and gave her a hug, having not seen his old friend in years. She had been a spy in Fallopia HQ for the past two years, getting closer and closer to the Ovis every day, gaining more and more of its confidences, and learning more of its secrets.

“I have news of your wife and son.” She replied, and noticed everyone’s attention return to her face. “And there is something else in the Ovis’ possession that I think you will be interested in, but there is no time to explain it all now – I must get back the Ovis’ side before it realises I am gone and begins to doubt my loyalty. You are free to fly in The Sabre with me, or you can take your own ship.”

“Well, we are waiting on the Cheesemaker, aren’t we?” Tok’kir asked, noticing an odd mark on the woman’s forehead, much like a P with two parallel lines through it below the curve.

“Well, you would have been if he hadn’t boarded me en route to this place” Ashtray Assassin replied.
“You knew?”

No one could see where the voice had come from, but Ashtray pointed to a small silver lizard climbing out of the top front pocket of her leather jacket, just becoming visible.

“That’s Insomi Seuno?”

“I certainly am.” The lizard, now fully visible atop Ashtray’s shoulder, giggled. “Well, sort of anyway.”

The lizard jumped from his lofty position, and as it fell, it began to change its shape, rather quickly, into that of a short, light looking man, with skin the same colour as the lady whose shoulder he had just left, as well as the same mark on his forehead.

“I thought the Silver Drake form would be sure to get past your security sensors… What found me?” Insomi asked, looking quite serious.

“Oh, you got past all the sensors, alright. You just forget that I have been a Blood Member of the Order of the Ark for a much longer time than you have – I could feel you as soon as you were close enough to see me….

“That or it was just your huge gun.” She said jokingly.

“HA! I like this girl. Actually, though, the gun is better shielded than I am – I bet none of you even saw Bouncer before I mentioned her by name.”

That was when they all noticed the magnificent piece of machinery hanging from Insomi’s right arm – as long as one of his legs, the straight, thin barrel-styled energy weapon looked rather impressive.

“It’s one of my best works. I named it after an old friend who was lost in battle a few months ago, which was my inspiration to create the weapon. After he was lost, I vowed that I would take a more active role in the downfall of the Ovis.”

“Noble sentiments.” One of the gathered said, and all agreed.

“Well, we must be off. Ashtray has to return to the Ovis so that she isn’t discovered, and we have to get Cloe and Jimmy. Insomi, you brought the isotopes and the “enhancement” for Bouncer, didn’t you?” GooBer asked Insomi.

“Of course - they’re on the ship that I had follow Ashtray’s Sabre. It will be here in exactly
3…
2…
1…
Now!”
There was a small flash of light, and Insomi looked pleased at his accomplishment of predicting the exact moment that his ship, The Paigas, would arrive. However, the rest of those about to embark on their quest were rather confused – they hadn’t heard any ship land on the roof, nor on the street outside (which would have surely caused some unrest), and were almost certain that small flashes of light did not constitute a ship landing anywhere.

“And? Where is it?”

“Right here” Insomi waved his arms around, seemingly showing them the room they were still standing in. “Ashtray, we shall meet you there. Run along now, you don’t want to be late.”

“Um, ok…” She looked at GooBer for confirmation that everything was okay, and he nodded, though more like he was convincing himself than her. And Ashtray knew GooBer still had his ship if Insomi was a little more eccentric than genius, so she left.

“I’ll leave the back gate open for you.” She smiled. “Oh, and Insomi – make sure you tell them what the Ark is. I’ve found it, and we’re getting it back.”

And she was gone – to the roof, most likely, where her ship, The Sabre, was docked.

…

“So, Insomi, where is this ship exactly?” hydeist_ asked rather tentatively.

“Right here – all around us.” He moved over to the other side of the Pathetic Triangle, and placed his hands against what seemed to be a wall, though none of them could see anything there.

“See?” He rapped his hands against the “wall” and the four of them heard the dull sound of knuckle on a thick metal bulkhead.

“Just trust me. I am a genius, after all.”

Insomi moved back to the side where Tok’kir, hydeist_ and d_vinci where standing, and ushered GooBer over.

“You do still have the retractable kitchen wall don’t you? The one that overlooks the street?” Insomi thought he should just make sure before he decided to fly through it.

“Yes, I ended up just getting it fixed, not totally extracted, after the last time someone flew through it” While saying this, GooBer most certainly was not looking at d_vinci, the one who was looking rather sheepish right now.

“Oh good. I would hate to think my ingenuity had gone to waste.” As Insomi said this, the middle of the floor in the main room lifted up, taking with it the Triangle, the day bed, and the five soon-to-be-travellers.

As they moved slowly to the kitchen, they noticed the loose appliances move to one side, the sink and benches lower, and the fridge jump try to attach itself onto the ship. hydeist_ was sure he heard it pleading with him for release from captivity, but none of the others seemed to hear it, so left it alone… well, almost – he did pull some food out of it first, seeing as, though it was only going to be about a day to get to the asteroid, none of them knew where it would be when they were finished with their mission… and none of them really fancied the idea of cannibalism, so…

“So what was that Ark thing that Ashtray mentioned as she left?” d_vinci interrupted hydeist_’s thoughts for a very important news bulletin.

GooBer and Insomi looked at each other, and Insomi’s forehead mark shimmered. GooBer was reminded once more of the same mark on Cloe’s and Jimmy’s foreheads, usually covered by their fringes, said: “Insomi, I’m going to let you take that one.”, moven over to the day bed and promptly fell asleep.

TO BE CONTINUED