Heads, and shoulders...

[phrasemuffin]

... flail and squee, flail and squee, flail and squee.

Flail: my 21st. It is coming. It was organised. Mostly. In theory. Then I realised I Did Not Want. Mainly Teh Evil Family. Also the venue. Teh Evil Family got kicked off. Which meant Teh Goodside Family had to go too. So just friends. Venue changed too. Venue change meant theme change. Who would do masquerade at a restaurant? In Ashfield? For Thai? Too inconsistent. Am re-thinking. Mother-type got out of sorts for not having Teh Evil Family. Because they are Evil. And because they would curse us. With Abstinence. Actually a Blessing in Disguise. Reminded her that they get combined Christmas/My 21st at a park (... o_0?) the week before. Still guilty-ish. Re-added Teh Goodside Family. Numbers dropped from 80 to 46. Much less expensive. But no more Blessing. Just wish I could have EVERYONE that I originally planned to have (Teh Evil Family is only about 10 of the 34 people I had to cut from the list).

To make up for that...

Squee: Alice in Wonderland. Soon to be movie. Again. But better! With Sweeney Todd and Mrs Lovett as Mad Hatter and Red Queen. Yay for that dude who is her husband! That... crazy dude. You know? Yes. That one.


On an unrelated note: I have decided to go into business for myself. There just aren't any jobs in the world. Anywhere. Ever. So I am going to sell paralyzed birds. I feel it is an untapped market. Think of the sales! I will be an industry pioneer. Would you like a bird, sir? A paralyzed bird? I shall say. Why, yes, sir! Thank you, sir! my customers shall reply with glee. I shall be a milionaire. And you will all get discounts! 30% off for the rest of your lives! Also, we will do parties. Birthday parties. For small children. Small children LOVE paralyzed birds. It will be the craze of the next generation. Generation Impaired!

Also... I have found my dream birthday present. It won't happen though. It would be my Christmas and birthday, and Easter, too, if we did Easter presents, present and probably from my entire immediate family and then some (because we try to set limits on how much we spend on each other, to keep things fair I guess). It is this awesome graphics tablet with interactive pen display! And it will never be mine unless the paralyzed bird industry booms before a better model comes out.

Comments

[eggs-maledict.livejournal.com]

Now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein' tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk!

[phrasemuffin.livejournal.com]

Yes, and you assured me you weren't English.

I'm sorry, sir, but I think you'll find it very much alive. See the soft, milky glazing of the eyes? The poor thing's remembering its last good flight before it became paralyzed. Those are tears of pain and loss, which would have been expelled as tears were the tear ducts not paralyzed. Because Parrots cry milk.

Also, was your beard that itchy when you were in this morning?

[eggs-maledict.livejournal.com]

'E's not crying! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!


*ahem*

Vernacular aside, ARGH! Itchy beardiness...gnargh...

[phrasemuffin.livejournal.com]

Well, then, it's because you neglected to feed him! I am therefore free of guilt, and the need to bribe away lawsuits.

[eggs-maledict.livejournal.com]

Damn...always one step ahead!